Posts Tagged ‘Maine’

Thoughts on Maine

Tuesday, November 17th, 2009

By Natalie French

Date: Monday, 2 November 2009

Maine mapOkay, I went for a long walk thinking about the battle for Marriage Equality in Maine and here is what I came up with.

I think we should have votes all over the country on who is allowed –or required–to get married.

Should people who have no intention of having kids be allowed to get married?

If you have at least three kids are you required to marry? There are a lot of GLBT families who want to adopt kids and plenty of unwanted pregnancies heading toward abortions. Are the hellfire Christians just too proud to admit that we are here, we’re queer, and we can solve that problem?

A mandatory marriage mobile will arrive at the houses of randomly chosen single straight people (can’t tell you bland folks apart) for your required nuptials where we will decorate, cater, arrange the flowers and play great dance music for the reception. Seriously, is there anything gayer than a wedding?

Are celebrities allowed to marry more often than every three years? I think we should vote on who marries Britney, Angelina and Clooney next.

Should boring people be required to marry each other to get them off the cool singles scene?

Are ugly people allowed the same civil rights as those of us who are charming? Who decides if you are ugly?

If you can walk down the aisle in high heels and look hot in a veil, can you legally be declared a bride no matter what gender is listed on your birth certificate?

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Natalie French is a friend of ours who lives in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

What do you think? Comment here.