We read with interest Daphne Merkin’s “Butch Fatale” piece about Rachel Maddow in the New York Times Women’s Fashion Spring 2009 magazine a couple weeks ago.
It gave us a chuckle to think of Rachel Maddow as “fatale” anything, because she’s clearly a good-looking, sexy butch who whets our news whistle each evening on MSBNC.
Then we stumbled upon Jen Sabella’s rebuttal on AfterEllen: “The New York Times Tackles ‘Butch Fatale.’” It’s an excellent essay, and we commend Sabella’s skewering wit and astute commentary.
We were uneasy too when we read “Butch Fatale.” As a proud butch/femme couple, we found it rather odd to see “lipstick lesbians” equated with femmes, the femmes in question barely acknowledged. According to Merkin, there are only two “Sapphic archetypes” and “both categories (butch and femme)” derive from “gender-influenced dichotomies of beauty.”
Give us a break.
Sabella also pulled out this zinger: “In one of [Daphne Merkin’s] books, Dreaming of Hitler, she says that even lesbians ‘wish to be filled with something hard and penislike and not-female.’”
Our favorite comment came from Jenna DQ, and with her permission we’re quoting her comment nearly in full:
“I might get eaten alive for this, but, yeah, obviously there are plenty of lesbians who enjoy penetration. Even straight men like penetration (those who’ll admit it anyway). What vagina wig is missing here is the same thing stupid people (excuse the gross generalization) miss all the time. It’s not strictly a genital thing. Half of sex occurs in the mind! So ask a lesbian who enjoys penetration if there’s a difference between being f*ed by a man or a woman…Ask a gay top if there’s a difference between f*ing a woman’s butt or a man’s…Ask a straight man if there’s a difference between getting a beej from a man or a woman! You are making love to a sexuality, not a genital.
“Come on. Get with it…not to mention that there are plenty of women who do not enjoy penetration, so where does her generalizing, dismissive statement fit them in?”
We couldn’t have said it better. Thanks, Jenna!
We recommend reading this intelligent article and equally intelligent comments at AfterEllen.
Yours in good love and sex,
Nan & Christi
nan@fatalemedia.com
christi@fatalemedia.com
P.S. To see Fatale’s latest DVD with lesbians who like penetration, check out One Night Stand. For guys who like it, Bend Over Boyfriend is the sex-ed gold standard.
“Butch Fatale”
Monday, March 16th, 2009We read with interest Daphne Merkin’s “Butch Fatale” piece about Rachel Maddow in the New York Times Women’s Fashion Spring 2009 magazine a couple weeks ago.
It gave us a chuckle to think of Rachel Maddow as “fatale” anything, because she’s clearly a good-looking, sexy butch who whets our news whistle each evening on MSBNC.
Then we stumbled upon Jen Sabella’s rebuttal on AfterEllen: “The New York Times Tackles ‘Butch Fatale.’” It’s an excellent essay, and we commend Sabella’s skewering wit and astute commentary.
We were uneasy too when we read “Butch Fatale.” As a proud butch/femme couple, we found it rather odd to see “lipstick lesbians” equated with femmes, the femmes in question barely acknowledged. According to Merkin, there are only two “Sapphic archetypes” and “both categories (butch and femme)” derive from “gender-influenced dichotomies of beauty.”
Give us a break.
Sabella also pulled out this zinger: “In one of [Daphne Merkin’s] books, Dreaming of Hitler, she says that even lesbians ‘wish to be filled with something hard and penislike and not-female.’”
Our favorite comment came from Jenna DQ, and with her permission we’re quoting her comment nearly in full:
“I might get eaten alive for this, but, yeah, obviously there are plenty of lesbians who enjoy penetration. Even straight men like penetration (those who’ll admit it anyway). What vagina wig is missing here is the same thing stupid people (excuse the gross generalization) miss all the time. It’s not strictly a genital thing. Half of sex occurs in the mind! So ask a lesbian who enjoys penetration if there’s a difference between being f*ed by a man or a woman…Ask a gay top if there’s a difference between f*ing a woman’s butt or a man’s…Ask a straight man if there’s a difference between getting a beej from a man or a woman! You are making love to a sexuality, not a genital.
“Come on. Get with it…not to mention that there are plenty of women who do not enjoy penetration, so where does her generalizing, dismissive statement fit them in?”
We couldn’t have said it better. Thanks, Jenna!
We recommend reading this intelligent article and equally intelligent comments at AfterEllen.
Yours in good love and sex,
Nan & Christi
nan@fatalemedia.com
christi@fatalemedia.com
P.S. To see Fatale’s latest DVD with lesbians who like penetration, check out One Night Stand. For guys who like it, Bend Over Boyfriend is the sex-ed gold standard.
Tags:butch-femme, Daphne Merkin, Lesbian Sex, Rachel Maddow
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