Posts Tagged ‘Pepper’

Sex Tips: Sex for One for Two

Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

Masturbating with your partner is a tried-and-true “sex tip” said to get you in the mood for penetration. But we think solo sex can be fun when one partner merely watches. Something interesting happens. The sexual energy changes; the dynamics between the two of you change.

Masturbating while your lover watches can be scary at first. You’re completely vulnerable. Whether you’re in a hot tub with your pussy up against the streaming jets of water or whether you’re lying in bed with the vibrator turned on high, you have to force yourself into your body, purely into your own space, allowing yourself to really feel what you feel. To let your clit take over.

But once you let go, the trust seems to deepen…and okay, we’ll admit it, the desire for more–including penetration–often takes over.

What’s the best way to begin? Talking to your lover is always good advice, but having a vibrator at the ready also helps.

Try pulling it out and smiling suggestively. Let the little thing buzz. If you’ve got music or a video on, the buzzing won’t make it seem like you’ve taken up beekeeping.

If your partner wants to participate, just say, “I’ll be all yours in a moment, honey. I just want to try something different.”

Watching is a great turn-on. You can talk dirty, or caress your lover’s face or breasts without distracting her.

Nina Hartley and PepperThere’s some fabulous porn that can inspire a solo scene with your partner too. Suburban Dykes has a wonderful side-by-side masturbation scene with Nina Hartley and Pepper together on a phone sex line. Whoa, mama!

We’re also partial to the Mystery Masturbator in Take Her Down!–explicit and actually a good how-to for those of you who feel squeamish or unsure how to actually get things going down there.

If you’re into anal, we recommend Greta’s vignette in Clips with an anal self-loving scene that will open you up for sure!

Our friend Cory Silverberg has compiled some straightforward how-to advice at And don’t forget our good friend Betty Dodson, the queen of masturbation and author of the classic Sex For One.

One last word of advice, let yourself go. Don’t stop till you’ve come at least once!
Want more lovers’ masturbation tips? Check out “Masturbation for Lovers.”

Note: “Sex for One for Two” originally appeared in a slightly different form in the January 2004 Fatale Media newsletter.

Sex Tips: Masturbation for Lovers

Thursday, April 16th, 2009

Speaking of masturbation, some couples forget that this can be one sexy turn-on, especially if one of you has her period or wants to try something different. So we’re bringing back a very popular sex tips column.
Masturbating side-by-side with your lover can be one of the sexiest entrees to lovemaking or a just a great way to relax and enjoy each other without the pressure to perform.

You can masturbate while your partner watches, or watch as your lover masturbates. Or you can both just lie there and enjoy listening as her breathing quickens.
Some couples like to get in the mood by watching a sexy DVD. Other couples talk dirty to each other.

Use your vibrator or your hand. You can also lie on your belly and ride a pillow, which works great especially if your vibrator is plugged in and humming.

Rules or no rules? Some couples like to have set guidelines. Do you have to ask permission? Do you like being touched while you’re masturbating? If you’re not sure, just roll with it.

If your lover touches you—perhaps stroking your breast or belly, perhaps putting her hand on top of yours while you masturbate—see how you feel. Is it a pleasant sensation? Distracting? Do you like it? Talk with your lover about the experience.

If you’re shy, the best way to try masturbating with your partner is to get under the covers, turn off the lights and close your eyes. Relax and let your fantasies take you where you will. Touch yourself and let yourself feel the sensations of skin and hair. Then gradually touch yourself between your legs and explore.

Masturbating together in the shower or bathtub can be a real turn-on, too. You’ll need some lube, no doubt, so make sure you’ve got some nearby.

If you’ve got a Jacuzzi, hot tub or sauna, position yourself over one of those jets of water and tease your lover by masturbating for her. She can choose to just watch or please herself over another water jet.

Most of all, have fun! If it’s not fun, then there’s no sense continuing. Instead, ask your lover for what you want. Talk to her. Find out what’s holding her back or why she doesn’t like to see you masturbate.


For a sexy side-by-side masturbation scene with Nina Hartley and Pepper (Miss Sharon Mitchell stars as well), check out Suburban Dykes, still one of Fatale’s faves and a classic.