Archive for the ‘Ask Fanny’ Category

G-Spot Lessons

Thursday, September 12th, 2013

Deborah Sundahl Female Ejaculation ExpertDoes G-spot sex come naturally to you? To a lot of people, it doesn’t, and for that G-spot diva Deborah Sundahl offers a wealth of resources.

Want to learn where the G-spot is, what it is and how to make your woman have the deepest, sexiest orgasms you ever imagined? Then Female Ejaculation: The Workshop is for you. An all-woman cast provides a safe space in which to talk, to touch, to explore.

Female Ejaculation for CouplesWant to explore G-spot orgasms in a straight couples context? Then we recommend Female Ejaculation for Couples. Three straight couples talk openly and learn to have G-spot sex under the tutelage of expert Deborah Sundahl.

Deborah also offers in-person workshops. These intimate, loving sessions are just right if you want or need guidance from an experienced, gentle teacher.

Deborah guides you to learn where the G-spot is, what makes it so vital to fulfilling sex, and how to massage the G-spot to achieve maximum pleasure. Workshops are either for women only or for couples.

Her female ejaculation and the G-spot webinars are perfect if you want to participate but aren’t in the neighborhood where Deborah is teaching.

Now through November, she’s in the U.K., Europe and Ireland giving workshops and lectures. Countries include England, Ireland, Germany, Switzerland, Copenhagen, Poland, Belgium and France. She returns to the U.S. at the end of the year.

Check out Deborah’s complete events calendar, including webinars.

See all Deborah’s DVDs and female ejaculation book on Fatale’s site.

Ask Fanny: Keys to Female Ejaculation

Saturday, December 1st, 2012

Deborah Sundahl Female Ejaculation ExpertG-spot expert Deborah Sundahl, a.k.a. Fanny Fatale, answers your questions about female ejaculation and the g-spot.

Dear Deborah,

I’ve identified some things that help me ejaculate: being relaxed; massage on the whole body; lots of stimulation and preliminaries before masturbation starts; pressure on my pelvis; performing oral sex on my partner while she masturbates me. Are they all “procedures” you would recommend? Any others to add?


Jane C.

Dear Jane,

This is good that you know your body and what it likes!! Most women ejaculate when they are relaxed and feeling happy with themselves and their partner. Often, a woman going through a divorce or difficult time with her partner will stop ejaculating. This is because female ejaculation is tied to our emotions; the G-spot is emotional by nature! Good news for women who can now express themselves fully during lovemaking and through their G-spot orgasms.

Therefore, how you touch a woman or how you touch yourself is not a procedure; rather it is a time of self-loving and expressing love to your partner. The more you connect on this level, and let your body talk and lead by getting your thoughts out of the way, the more pleasure you have and the more you ejaculate. Then, you will be shocked at the large quantity that you can ejaculate, and the fun you both can have, and the dance that occurs without effort, seemingly on its own.


Send your questions to

P.S. Check out Adventurous Couples Unite!, the perfect gift for those who want to explore female ejaculation.

P.P.S. Ask Fanny’s advice columns, including “G-Spot Ecstasy,” sex tips and more, are located here at the Fatale blog in the category “Ask Fanny.”

New Poll: Are You Following?

Friday, August 31st, 2012

Last month, we wondered if you believe the G-spot is real. This on the heels of a great Q&A from Ask Fanny’s Deborah Sundahl, “G-Spot Ecstasy.”

Check out the G-spot poll results.

Now we want to know:

Are you following the women’s health issues in this year’s U.S. Presidential campaign?

Yes or No? Vote Now.

The poll is on Fatale’s home page and 100% anonymous

Till next time, we wish you fabulous sex. May all your dreams come true.

Nan and Christi

Fatale Media

P.S. Looking for gifts, with absolutely free gift-wrapping and personalized gift cards? Check out Fatale Media’s fabulous giftssave 15% and more!

Poll Reminder: G-Spot?

Saturday, August 11th, 2012

Poll reminder: Is the G-spot real?

Female Ejaculation for CouplesG-spot orgasms? Really? Vote now!

The poll is on Fatale’s home page and is completely anonymous.

Stay tuned. We’ll give you the results in a couple weeks.

Until then, we wish you dazzling hot sex!

Nan and Christi

P.S. Check out Female Ejaculation for Couples and these Fatale Media lesbian favorites. Plus, save 15% and more on Fatale gift sets.

Ask Fanny: G-Spot Ecstasy

Wednesday, August 1st, 2012

G-spot expert Deborah Sundahl, a.k.a. Fanny Fatale, answers your questions about female ejaculation and the g-spot.

Hello, Deborah
I’ve purchased both your book and video in my desperate quest to join the female ejaculation phenomenon. Years ago, when I was younger, I ejaculated and like everyone for the first time, I had no idea what it was.  Fast forward 16 years later, now at 38, I’ve been trying for a few years–little squirts but a strong smell of urine, even after using the toilet.

After reading the book Deborah Sundahl G-Spot ExpertI continued to be confused and unsuccessful. After purchasing the video, last week, I did it–and it was a big gush. It was everything I’ve read–no smell, different taste and no trace of it once it dried. I was so proud.

I went back at it the next day–nothing! Now every day since then, still nothing. I’m getting the “pee” feelings, feeling orgasmic, relaxed and ready, so I push…little trickles that ultimately smell like urine.

Help!! What am I doing wrong?


Looking for G-Spot Ecstasy

Dear Looking,
Thanks for writing to me. First off, congratulations! You ejaculated! Go out and celebrate the reclaiming of your womanhood at age 38, after stopping it all these years because you didn’t know what female ejaculation was! For that is what women do–we unconsciously just stop doing it, because it could be pee or worse. Who knows! We just don’t think about it. I am glad you are proud!

So, that being the case–years of controlling and holding back ejaculate–do you think it is just going to magically spout forth because now we want it to? No! Our bodies are not machines, and most certainly our G-spots are not. Rather, the G-spot is the gateway to higher love and intimacy.

The other problem is feeling “desperate “ Desperation causes pressure. In my book I write that pressure will make you not ejaculate. We don’t want desperate.

Time for a big, deep breath. Relax. Breathe. Treat your G-spot and vagina like tender gold, okay?  Sweet and soft, loving. Slow down. You would not believe how many women I have to advise to slow down!

I would say the urine you initially smelled was because you were perhaps pushing too hard? Without knowing the details, I would say that watching the video–which one was it? I’m assuming it was How to Female Ejaculate: The Workshop–unconsciously helped you to let go.

Letting go is of course the biggest obstacle for women in learning to ejaculate, especially because of the fear of urinating.

You also cannot expect to ejaculate the same “big” way the next day! Your body needs a rest, especially if you are just learning. As men know, if they masturbate too much, they will blow out their prostate glands (that “dull ache deep inside” that men can get is from too much ejaculation).

Therefore, yes, you were getting the pee feelings, and feeling orgasmic, of course, because you are arousing yourself, but then you can’t go any further. I’d say this is because of a combination of 1) it being too soon since you last ejaculated fully, 2) also you’re still new at it and 3) you’re probably trying again too hard and/or too soon to push.

You have to make sure that you take time to build up the arousal, and the best way to do that is to enjoy yourself without wanting to do it too fast. Relax! Take your time. Enjoy the process. Breathe deeply to work up such a big orgasm. This can be a months-long learning process.

In a way, what you described about the “little trickles” could be the perfect description of “clearing out the pipes”!

Big hug for your really great work so far! Next step: celebrate yourself. Second step: slow down, breathe and relax. Please keep in touch, and let me know how it is going.

Let It Flow,


P.S. Do you have a question about female ejaculation and the G-spot. for “Ask Fanny,” a.k.a. Deborah Sundahl? Write to askfanny (at) Your letter will be kept in strictest confidence, reprinted here only with your prior approval.

New Poll: Is the G-Spot Real?

Monday, July 30th, 2012

Last month, we wondered what your porn style was. Lesbians, anyone?

Check out the porn style poll results.

Nora EphronNot long ago, we overheard a conversation about the G-spot and female ejaculation. Probably when we were mourning Nora Ephron, who wrote the amazing orgasm scene from When Harry Met Sally.

Could it be that we were having this conversation all over again?

Does the G-spot exist? Is the G-spot real?

That’s our poll question for this month. Vote now! The poll is Fatale’s home page.

Then tell us what you think.

Until next time, we wish you deliciously hot sex, and plenty of G-spot orgasms, if you believe in them,

Nan and Christi

Full Load laundry room sceneP.S. To see some real not faked G-spot orgasms (if you believe in them), check out Full Load. The last scene especially, down in the laundry room, gushes!

Another orgasmic recommendation: Hard Love and How to Fuck in High Heels–no question these gushers are fabulous!

Want to learn about female ejaculation and the G-spot? Check out Female Ejaculation: The Workshop by G-spot expert Deborah Sundahl.

Satisfaction…Getting No?

Friday, May 4th, 2012

Wendy Delorme Sexual Satisfaction and Female EjaculationThe issue of women’s satisfaction in bed has been of more than passing interest to us since the beginning. After all, that’s how Fatale Media came of age.

Our friend Deborah Sundahl, known also as “Ask Fanny,” is our very own female-ejaculation expert who knows a thing or two about women’s satisfaction in bed. After all, she teaches women and couples how to expand their relationships and how to achieve sexual satisfaction they couldn’t have dreamed of before.

Curious, we asked Deborah what questions she gets most often about sex. In response, she sent us a new “Ask Fanny” column.

  • What is “the urge to female ejaculate”?
  • Why can’t a woman have G-spot orgasms each time she and her partner make love?

These are the questions Deborah addresses in her Q&A “The Urge to Female Ejaculate,” and in her female-ejaculation workshops.

Yours in good love and sex,

Christi and Nan

P.S. Deborah’s next female ejaculation for couples workshop is to be held in Seattle, June 1-3, 2012. You can also experience one of Deborah’s workshops in Female Ejaculation: The Workshop.

P.P.S. Check out all Fatale’s DVDs.

Ask Fanny: The Urge to Female Ejaculate

Friday, May 4th, 2012

Deborah Sundahl G-Spot ExpertG-spot expert Deborah Sundahl, a.k.a. Fanny Fatale, answers your questions about female ejaculation and the g-spot.

Dear Fanny,

My partner ejaculates now and then, and we are wondering how to make it happen all the time. We have been together about 12 years now, and she often feels “uncomfortable” in her pelvis area after lovemaking.

Jacob from Olympia, WA

Dear Jacob,

You are not alone in wanting to know how to make female ejaculation happen all the time, or at least when you’d like it to. This is a common question for many couples. The uncomfortable feeling of pressure that she is experiencing after you make love is female ejaculate that has not had a chance to be released. What to do?

First off, remember it is okay if a woman does not ejaculate every time she makes love. To put that kind of pressure on her—really, on both of you—is to run the risk of making the female ejaculate stop altogether, which it will.

Next, here are some of the possible reasons why your partner is not ejaculating every time the two of you make love:

• Oftentimes, women mistake the urge to ejaculate as the urge to pee and therefore clamp down on the urge to ejaculate.

• Women don’t always trust that this is indeed female ejaculate, and therefore (almost instinctively), they don’t let go, physically and emotionally.

• Most women are not aware of the many sensations inside the vagina, including the G-spot’s erotic sensations. In order to ejaculate, a woman needs to be more aware of these varied sensations. It may seem counterintuitive, but this lack of awareness actually can lead a woman to control her ejaculate so it won’t release; she holds back; she doesn’t trust the urge to ejaculate.

The best way that I have determined from teaching my female-ejaculation and the G-spot workshops for many years now is to do a meditation massage session, at least five of these in the space of 2-3 weeks.

G-spot massage allows a woman to connect with the vaginal and G-spot sensations of pleasure. This is not about masturbating per se, stimulating the G-spot to pleasure; this is about getting acquainted via touch with one’s G-spot in a deeper way than just knowing how to stimulate it to create pleasure.

The end result is of course more pleasure and more control in a good way over the ability to female ejaculate.

And, just as importantly but far more overlooked, you and your partner benefit from gaining an intimate knowledge with what the G-spot feels like when it is not in high-gear, erotic performance mode.

By trying massage, women feel so much more connected to their G-spots and to the “urge to ejaculate.” Through this process, a woman becomes conscious of her ability to control her ejaculate. This means she no longer holds back, but understands how to ejaculate whenever she wants (or not)!

Next time, we’ll discuss how to massage your G-spot. Stay tuned!


P.S. Deborah Sundahl teaches these skills to couples in her annual weekend workshop for couples, taking place this year on a lovely island just west of Seattle, June 1-3, 2012.

P.P.S. Experience a workshop with Deborah Sundahl’s bestselling Female Ejaculation: The Workshop and Female Ejaculation for Couples.


Your Letters: Changing Women’s Lives

Friday, April 13th, 2012

One recent comment here on the Fatale Media Blog we wanted to share with you:

I am so grateful to Fatale Media. Just received my DVDs yesterday and “Female Ejaculation: The Workshop” has already changed three women’s lives!

We were so ready for this information, and now we are going to share it with everyone we know!! I watched the first 47 minutes and then went to the shower, used my dildo for 30 seconds and ejaculated!

I have had an ejaculation before, but now I understand how to do it! Hooray! thanks thanks thanks!!!

You are very welcome!

Female Ejaculation the WorkshopChanging women’s lives—for the better—makes us very, very happy.

Deborah Sundahl’s work on female ejaculation and the G-spot has been groundbreaking and like no other.

In addition to Female Ejaculation: The Workshop, check out another of Deborah’s videos about how to female ejaculate: Female Ejaculation for Couples.


Deborah Sundahl on Tour

Friday, March 30th, 2012

Deborah Sundahl Female Ejaculation ExpertG-spot expert and female-ejaculation queen Deborah Sundahl—you may also know her as Fatale Media columnist “Ask Fanny”—is headed on tour, beginning in California on April 3, 2012 at the Pure Pleasure Store in Santa Cruz, California.

After California, she heads up the West Coast to Oregon and Washington. More information about these free, informative lectures is available at .

In addition to these lectures, there are one-day G-spot workshops for women. These all-day workshops are very reasonable at $95.

Female Ejaculation Workshops:

April 7, 2012
Sonoma County, CA
9:00 am – 5:00 pm Cost $95
Contact: Deborah Sundahl

April 22, 2012
Portland, OR
10:00 am – 5:00 pm
Cost $95
Lotus Heart Center

For more information, contact: Deborah Sundahl

Later in the year Deborah is headed to Germany. Stay tuned for more information!

Female Ejaculation for CouplesP.S. Deborah’s bestselling DVDs Female Ejaculation: The Workshop and Female Ejaculation for Couples give you a great way to experience a G-spot workshop from the comfort of your home.